Quote written by D.H. Lawrence
Essay written by Matthew Shoesmith
As humans we are diverse in our belief systems, how we live our life and also the way we treat each other. The human soul is a reflection of who we are as a person, it is neither physical nor can we see it, but it is the most important aspect and defines us. Lawrence is exclaiming in his quote that even though food is required to function for our survival, who we are and how we treat others and see the world is very important. We thrive on feelings and mixed emotions that shape us into the beings we are today.
It is important to analyse how we define beauty. A personal reflection would see beauty as the forever-ending aim to deter imperfection and maintain physical integrity. Beauty in our modern world is commonly referred to as how one appears in a physical sense. Beauty, both physical and spiritual is important; on one hand when we feel beautiful we project feelings of self-confidence, happiness and content. When we are considered beautiful spiritually, the way we act and treat others in the appropriate matter is a main contributor. Being selfless and helping those in poor situations without the need for personal gain makes us beautiful people. Between the two, inner beauty prevails and has a greater and more positive impact on ones own feeling and the feelings of others that they impact upon.
The media has grossly created an imbalance in how we should reflect on oneself in relation to our superficial representation. Many males and females have been subject to poor self-esteem, depression and unhappiness due to how they are expected to present and look, which inevitably impacts on how they project themselves and who they are as a person. Later in life many children who were subject to bullying due to appearance will later treat others with the same patterns of abuse, clearly affecting who they are and the beauty of their soul.
The soul is shaped from a young age when we are most susceptible for manipulation. Our parents and life experiences give us an understanding of how things are done and how we should act and treat others. In many cases, poor parenting and neglect will be a factor and give children the idea that this is how things are. Children in this environment will continue on, unhappy, leading to poor choices, poor reflections of who they are and create damage to their once perfect soul. It is important to understand that the soul is moulded, as adults we give light to how younger ones should act and therefore we are responsible for the consequences of creating a less optimal environment for them to blossom.
The soul is an easily manipulated entity that needs to be promoted to reflect beauty. This can be achieved through concentrating on the important aspects of life and how we as people can love and help others by forming bonds of supportive friendships with the important aspect being that others are happy and safe. The soul is easily corrupted and we must be careful not to influence others down the path of evil that will represent a soul with an ugly appearance.
By Matthew Shoesmith
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
Things are not always what they seem...
Two travelling angels stopped to spend the night in the home of a wealthy family. The family were rude and refused to let the angels stay in the mansion's guestroom. Instead the angels were given a small space in the cold basement. As they made their bed on the hard floor, the older angel saw a hole in the wall and repaired it. When the younger angel asked why, the older angel replied, things are not always what they seem.
The next night the pair came to rest at the house of a very poor but hospitable farmer and his wife. After sharng what little food they had, the couple let the angels sleep in their bed where they could have a good nights rest. When the sun came up the next morning the angels found the farmer and his wife in tears. Their only cow, whose milk had been their sole income, lay dead in the field. The younger angel was furious, and asked the older angel how could he have let this happen? The first man had everything, yet you helped him, she accused. The second family had little but was willing to share everything, and you let the cow die.
Things are not always what they seem, the older angel replied. When we stayed in the basement of the mansion, I noticed there was gold stored in the hole in the wall. Since the owner was so obsessed with greed and unwilling to share his good fortune, I sealed the wall so he wouldn't find it.
Last night as we slept in the farmers bed, the angel of death came for his wife. I gave him the cow instead.
Things are not always what they seem.
The next night the pair came to rest at the house of a very poor but hospitable farmer and his wife. After sharng what little food they had, the couple let the angels sleep in their bed where they could have a good nights rest. When the sun came up the next morning the angels found the farmer and his wife in tears. Their only cow, whose milk had been their sole income, lay dead in the field. The younger angel was furious, and asked the older angel how could he have let this happen? The first man had everything, yet you helped him, she accused. The second family had little but was willing to share everything, and you let the cow die.
Things are not always what they seem, the older angel replied. When we stayed in the basement of the mansion, I noticed there was gold stored in the hole in the wall. Since the owner was so obsessed with greed and unwilling to share his good fortune, I sealed the wall so he wouldn't find it.
Last night as we slept in the farmers bed, the angel of death came for his wife. I gave him the cow instead.
Things are not always what they seem.
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Your 'Divine' Inner Child
This concept called an Inner Child has been a part of the world for a very long time. Carl Jung called it the "Divine Child" and Emmet Fox called it the "Wonder Child." Some psychotherapist call it the "True Self". And Charles Whitfield called it the "Child Within."
The Inner Child refers to that part of each of us which is ultimately alive, energetic, creative and fulfilled; it is our "Genuine Authentic Self", who we know deep within us, as our "Real Self."
With our parents not really knowing, they helped to create this Inner Child. Society also helped with the creation. And most of us deny that there even exists such a part of us. When this child self is not allowed to be heard, or even acknowledged as being real, a false or co-dependent self (ego) emerges. We begin to live our lives as victims. Then we have situations that arise in our lives in which we keep having unresolved emotional traumas. The gradual accumulation of unfinished mental and emotional business can lead to chronic anxiety, fear, confusion, emptiness and unhappiness.
Denial of the Inner Child and the ego are particularly common among children and adults who grew up in troubled families. This is where chronic physical mental illness, rigidity, coldness or lack of nurturing is common. Yet, there is a way out. There is a way to discover and to heal our Inner Child and to break free of the bondage and suffering of our ego.
Not everyone was mistreated or abused as a child. No one really knows how many people have been loved and guided in healthy ways. Some have estimated 5 to 20 percent. This means that from 80 to 95 percent of the people did not receive guidance and love which is the way we know how to form healthy and loving relationships and to love ourselves.
There are dozens of ways you can connect with your Inner Children and help them to heal, feel loved and be happy. Children have a way of connecting with other children in a way that many adults don’t understand or know about. Sometimes just a glance or eye contact lets us know things that might take a thousand words to communicate.
There are ways to talk to the Inner Children. You can write a question to one or more of the Inner Children with the dominant hand and then allow the children to respond through the non-dominant hand. The art psychologist, Lucia Cappachione has written many books on this process of non-dominant handwriting or non-dominate artwork. Sometimes the answer does come in the form of a picture, rather than words. Please trust the process, it can be quite astounding. For many people, the Inner Child begins to say things that they have wanted to say forever. The "Wise Child" self speaks up and points out to you that as long as you stay in your left-brain, intellectual mode the Inner Children cannot penetrate the cold, unfeeling thoughts. When you start using your right brain, which isn’t used for writing, the child jumps in and expresses what it wants to say. The logical part of your brain is temporarily distracted allowing another kind of thought pattern to emerge.
Besides the Inner Child, we have many other selves that are trying to take control. We can't really hear the voices until we make an effort to do so. It is very important to tame the Inner Critic. That voice from the past often keeps beating up the Inner Children. This voice invades whatever trauma and pain there was in our childhoods. When using this inner dialogue technique the wise Nurturing Self can stand as a protector self for the Inner Children. It’s the job of the Nurturer to be loving and self-affirming. This part of us can also teach the Inner Critic a new job of support, instead to beating up the Child self, and can love the Inner Critic so that Child self can relax and not have to work so hard.
This is often where the internal battle begins. The Inner Critic has been keeping the Inner Children muffled and secluded. When the self starts to rebel and the Inner Children are finally released to be present to talk about their feelings, sometimes the Children selves lose control and play havoc with people's lives. So perhaps by reading this article you can begin to transform the Inner Critic to be a good internal parent, begin to listen the Inner Children and to allow them to have fun and be heard. It is also important to keep a balance in your life. The Inner Children need emotional and psychological limits.
I hope this article will support you toward a journey of profound healing. There are many books to assist you in doing more work on healing the Inner Child, as well as professional therapists. Now you can know new friends inside that have been longing to know you better for a long time. Remember the words "it is never to late to have a happy childhood."
Examples of some of the Children you might find inside are:
The Playful Child
That self that is naturally playful, creative, spontaneous and fun loving child. This self longs to play. Many of us have forgotten how to do this without guilt or anxiety that as adults we must be doing something that is worthwhile.
The Spoiled ChildThat part of us wants what they want and they want it now, and if they don’t get what they want, they throw temper tantrums.
The Neglected ChildThe child self that was always left alone without much nurturing and love. They don’t believe they are lovable or worthwhile. They don’t know how to love. They are depressed and want to cry.
The Abandoned ChildThis child self has been left in some way like divorce or adoption or just left because the parents were kept busy working. They are always fearful that they will be abandoned again and again. This part of the self is starving for extra attention and reassurance that they are safe and okay. This self is very lonely.
The Fearful Child
This part has been overly criticized when they were small. Now they are anxious and are in panic much of the time. They need lost of encouragement and positive affirmations.
The Unbonded ChildThis Inner Child never learns to be close to anyone. They are isolated. Intimacy feels alien and scary. Trust is a basic issue.
The Discounted ChildThis is a part of the self that was ignored and treated as though they did not exist. They don’t believe in themselves and need lots of love to assist and support them.
These are all possibilities of the different Inner Children that might be inside. There are many other selves as well. Perhaps the Ego self, or the self that hold shame, or the self the holds the information that was given to them by their parents or teachers or society as a whole.
Develop the ability to give yourself a profound healing experience. Together we can encourage your Inner Parent to cuddle your Inner Child when it is crying or needs to be heard. Soothe you Inner Child when he or she is under emotional stress. Use the awareness of the Inner Dialogues that are going on and become apart of the path you are on instead of being lead where you might not want to go. Ultimately you can heal and be a happy person in you life.
Peace to you on your journey to loving to yourself.
The Inner Child refers to that part of each of us which is ultimately alive, energetic, creative and fulfilled; it is our "Genuine Authentic Self", who we know deep within us, as our "Real Self."
With our parents not really knowing, they helped to create this Inner Child. Society also helped with the creation. And most of us deny that there even exists such a part of us. When this child self is not allowed to be heard, or even acknowledged as being real, a false or co-dependent self (ego) emerges. We begin to live our lives as victims. Then we have situations that arise in our lives in which we keep having unresolved emotional traumas. The gradual accumulation of unfinished mental and emotional business can lead to chronic anxiety, fear, confusion, emptiness and unhappiness.
Denial of the Inner Child and the ego are particularly common among children and adults who grew up in troubled families. This is where chronic physical mental illness, rigidity, coldness or lack of nurturing is common. Yet, there is a way out. There is a way to discover and to heal our Inner Child and to break free of the bondage and suffering of our ego.
Not everyone was mistreated or abused as a child. No one really knows how many people have been loved and guided in healthy ways. Some have estimated 5 to 20 percent. This means that from 80 to 95 percent of the people did not receive guidance and love which is the way we know how to form healthy and loving relationships and to love ourselves.
There are dozens of ways you can connect with your Inner Children and help them to heal, feel loved and be happy. Children have a way of connecting with other children in a way that many adults don’t understand or know about. Sometimes just a glance or eye contact lets us know things that might take a thousand words to communicate.
There are ways to talk to the Inner Children. You can write a question to one or more of the Inner Children with the dominant hand and then allow the children to respond through the non-dominant hand. The art psychologist, Lucia Cappachione has written many books on this process of non-dominant handwriting or non-dominate artwork. Sometimes the answer does come in the form of a picture, rather than words. Please trust the process, it can be quite astounding. For many people, the Inner Child begins to say things that they have wanted to say forever. The "Wise Child" self speaks up and points out to you that as long as you stay in your left-brain, intellectual mode the Inner Children cannot penetrate the cold, unfeeling thoughts. When you start using your right brain, which isn’t used for writing, the child jumps in and expresses what it wants to say. The logical part of your brain is temporarily distracted allowing another kind of thought pattern to emerge.
Besides the Inner Child, we have many other selves that are trying to take control. We can't really hear the voices until we make an effort to do so. It is very important to tame the Inner Critic. That voice from the past often keeps beating up the Inner Children. This voice invades whatever trauma and pain there was in our childhoods. When using this inner dialogue technique the wise Nurturing Self can stand as a protector self for the Inner Children. It’s the job of the Nurturer to be loving and self-affirming. This part of us can also teach the Inner Critic a new job of support, instead to beating up the Child self, and can love the Inner Critic so that Child self can relax and not have to work so hard.
This is often where the internal battle begins. The Inner Critic has been keeping the Inner Children muffled and secluded. When the self starts to rebel and the Inner Children are finally released to be present to talk about their feelings, sometimes the Children selves lose control and play havoc with people's lives. So perhaps by reading this article you can begin to transform the Inner Critic to be a good internal parent, begin to listen the Inner Children and to allow them to have fun and be heard. It is also important to keep a balance in your life. The Inner Children need emotional and psychological limits.
I hope this article will support you toward a journey of profound healing. There are many books to assist you in doing more work on healing the Inner Child, as well as professional therapists. Now you can know new friends inside that have been longing to know you better for a long time. Remember the words "it is never to late to have a happy childhood."
Examples of some of the Children you might find inside are:
The Playful Child
That self that is naturally playful, creative, spontaneous and fun loving child. This self longs to play. Many of us have forgotten how to do this without guilt or anxiety that as adults we must be doing something that is worthwhile.
The Spoiled ChildThat part of us wants what they want and they want it now, and if they don’t get what they want, they throw temper tantrums.
The Neglected ChildThe child self that was always left alone without much nurturing and love. They don’t believe they are lovable or worthwhile. They don’t know how to love. They are depressed and want to cry.
The Abandoned ChildThis child self has been left in some way like divorce or adoption or just left because the parents were kept busy working. They are always fearful that they will be abandoned again and again. This part of the self is starving for extra attention and reassurance that they are safe and okay. This self is very lonely.
The Fearful Child
This part has been overly criticized when they were small. Now they are anxious and are in panic much of the time. They need lost of encouragement and positive affirmations.
The Unbonded ChildThis Inner Child never learns to be close to anyone. They are isolated. Intimacy feels alien and scary. Trust is a basic issue.
The Discounted ChildThis is a part of the self that was ignored and treated as though they did not exist. They don’t believe in themselves and need lots of love to assist and support them.
These are all possibilities of the different Inner Children that might be inside. There are many other selves as well. Perhaps the Ego self, or the self that hold shame, or the self the holds the information that was given to them by their parents or teachers or society as a whole.
Develop the ability to give yourself a profound healing experience. Together we can encourage your Inner Parent to cuddle your Inner Child when it is crying or needs to be heard. Soothe you Inner Child when he or she is under emotional stress. Use the awareness of the Inner Dialogues that are going on and become apart of the path you are on instead of being lead where you might not want to go. Ultimately you can heal and be a happy person in you life.
Peace to you on your journey to loving to yourself.
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Welcome to Holland
For anyone who has a child outside the box will understand and hopefully enjoy this piece written by Carol Turkington.
Welcome to Holland
When you’re going to have a baby, it’s like you’re planning a vacation to Italy. You’re all excited. You get a whole bunch of guidebooks and you learn a few phrases in Italian so you can get around. When it comes time, you pack your bags and head for the airport — for Italy.
Only, when you land, the stewardess says, “Welcome to Holland.”
You look at one another in disbelief and shock and say, “Holland? What are you talking about? I signed up for Italy!”
But they explain there’s been a change of plans and you’ve landed in Holland, where you must stay. “But I don’t know anything about Holland! I don’t want to stay!”
But you do stay. You go out and buy some new guidebooks. You learn some new phrases and you meet people you never knew existed. The important thing is that you are not in a lowly, plague-infested slum, full of pestilence and famine. You are simply in a different place than you had planned. It’s slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy, but after you’ve been there a little while and you have a chance to catch your breath, you begin to discover that Holland has windmills. Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.
But everyone else you know is busy coming and going from Italy. They’re all bragging about what a great time they had there, and for the rest of your life you will say, ”Yes, that’s where I was going. That’s what I had planned.”
The pain of that will never, ever go away.
You have to accept that pain because the loss of that dream, the loss of that plan is a very, very significant loss. But if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn’t get to Italy, you will never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things about Holland.
Holland for us has been an interesting journey, one we feel very lucky to be experiencing. I have learnt to slow down, and take in all the beauty that life has to offer. One thing that still concerns me is that during every workshop, or training I attend the same common theme keeps raising its head, and that is once you have a diagnosis then what? I have decided to put a page out there to assist people know what they are entitled to, and whats out there...It will be titled "Children with a diagnosis". It will start out only covering 0-6 year olds as our son is six, although as I do socialise with other parents I will put whatever I can find out, and more. Please feel free to add, or advise if something has changed, or no longer available, or incorrect, so we can ensure this page remains relevant and up to date...
Yours truly
Writbitz...
Welcome to Holland
When you’re going to have a baby, it’s like you’re planning a vacation to Italy. You’re all excited. You get a whole bunch of guidebooks and you learn a few phrases in Italian so you can get around. When it comes time, you pack your bags and head for the airport — for Italy.
Only, when you land, the stewardess says, “Welcome to Holland.”
You look at one another in disbelief and shock and say, “Holland? What are you talking about? I signed up for Italy!”
But they explain there’s been a change of plans and you’ve landed in Holland, where you must stay. “But I don’t know anything about Holland! I don’t want to stay!”
But you do stay. You go out and buy some new guidebooks. You learn some new phrases and you meet people you never knew existed. The important thing is that you are not in a lowly, plague-infested slum, full of pestilence and famine. You are simply in a different place than you had planned. It’s slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy, but after you’ve been there a little while and you have a chance to catch your breath, you begin to discover that Holland has windmills. Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.
But everyone else you know is busy coming and going from Italy. They’re all bragging about what a great time they had there, and for the rest of your life you will say, ”Yes, that’s where I was going. That’s what I had planned.”
The pain of that will never, ever go away.
You have to accept that pain because the loss of that dream, the loss of that plan is a very, very significant loss. But if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn’t get to Italy, you will never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things about Holland.
Holland for us has been an interesting journey, one we feel very lucky to be experiencing. I have learnt to slow down, and take in all the beauty that life has to offer. One thing that still concerns me is that during every workshop, or training I attend the same common theme keeps raising its head, and that is once you have a diagnosis then what? I have decided to put a page out there to assist people know what they are entitled to, and whats out there...It will be titled "Children with a diagnosis". It will start out only covering 0-6 year olds as our son is six, although as I do socialise with other parents I will put whatever I can find out, and more. Please feel free to add, or advise if something has changed, or no longer available, or incorrect, so we can ensure this page remains relevant and up to date...
Yours truly
Writbitz...
Monday, April 25, 2011
Philosophy...
Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
- Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet
Most parents long to provide their children with the best they can offer on every level. But what is "the best"?
Less enlightened parents will see in the child a symbol of all the lost potentials of their own youth, and will envision not the future toward which the child is best suited to aspire, but the future which they would have wished for themselves.
More enlightened parents will understand the wisdom of Kahlil Gibran's words, recognising not only the magic of the child as a symbol of new life, but also the profound gift of being caretaker for a developing soul with a unique individuality and a life journey which cannot be dictated in advance. Children have their own inherent blueprint for life, independent of external factors.
I know the type of parent I wish to aspire to...
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
- Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet
Most parents long to provide their children with the best they can offer on every level. But what is "the best"?
Less enlightened parents will see in the child a symbol of all the lost potentials of their own youth, and will envision not the future toward which the child is best suited to aspire, but the future which they would have wished for themselves.
More enlightened parents will understand the wisdom of Kahlil Gibran's words, recognising not only the magic of the child as a symbol of new life, but also the profound gift of being caretaker for a developing soul with a unique individuality and a life journey which cannot be dictated in advance. Children have their own inherent blueprint for life, independent of external factors.
I know the type of parent I wish to aspire to...
Sunday, April 17, 2011
by popular demand...My music man...
He emerged from central station and positioned himself against a wall. A youngish white man in jeans & a long sleeved T-Shirt. He removed his guitar from the case, and threw in some change to plant the seed, swivelled to face the pedestrians and began to play. The music, and his voice so sweet.
I’d walk past each day, and toy with myself, do I stop and listen, or just hurry past and throw in a buck. Then one day I stopped! We talked briefly, and I hadn’t realised how much time had passed, and hadn’t noticed people walking by. Just for that moment, time had stopped.
He was a kind man, with a kind face, and had experienced so much through his lifetime, which made for interesting conversation. His music had not taken him where he’d wanted, and there were many failed relationships, as he battled with his demons.
After a period of time getting to know him, I suggested we go out for a meal to my favourite Italian restaurant which had that aire of romance, and stacks of atmosphere. The dishes were cheap, simple but authentic. There are no pretensions to grandeur, this is a good honest Italian restaurant. We drank two bottles of wine, laughed and talked for hours. People filled the restaurant whilst we were oblivious to what was going on around us.
until next time
yours truly
Writbitz
I’d walk past each day, and toy with myself, do I stop and listen, or just hurry past and throw in a buck. Then one day I stopped! We talked briefly, and I hadn’t realised how much time had passed, and hadn’t noticed people walking by. Just for that moment, time had stopped.
He was a kind man, with a kind face, and had experienced so much through his lifetime, which made for interesting conversation. His music had not taken him where he’d wanted, and there were many failed relationships, as he battled with his demons.
After a period of time getting to know him, I suggested we go out for a meal to my favourite Italian restaurant which had that aire of romance, and stacks of atmosphere. The dishes were cheap, simple but authentic. There are no pretensions to grandeur, this is a good honest Italian restaurant. We drank two bottles of wine, laughed and talked for hours. People filled the restaurant whilst we were oblivious to what was going on around us.
until next time
yours truly
Writbitz
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